I find it quite a paradox when people I don’t even know very well are able to read my facial expressions accurately, while my husband struggles to- but it’s not for lack of caring. It’s just the reality of one of the effects of Autism in our relationship.
How can it be
That with just one glance
A stranger looks into my eyes and sees into my soul?
Just one look
And there it is
A splash of colour
Reflective recognition
Of my inner world
It seems like everyone can see it
Except the one who loves me most
He knows me intimately
Of this there is no doubt
So close
Yet worlds apart
And after all these years
He still cannot see me
He goes by feel
Knowing through touch
Comforted by the feel
Of familiar patterns
And I am to him
The most familiar pattern
Yet when he looks into my eyes
He cannot read me
Sometimes it feels as if he does not see me
The stranger does not know me
But in that moment
He saw me