O God,
In my heart, in my inmost being
I know you are good
I know your word is true
And I long to worship you
I trust in Jesus for my salvation
I long to walk with you day by day
Yet in the world I feel so far from you
Even amongst your people I feel like a stranger still.
Why am I always on the outer?
Am I too scared to really belong?
How can I make the connection?
How can I live for you?
How can I give you glory by my words and actions?
How can I show that I love you?
Everything has become so meaningless
Is it all my fault?
Where did I go wrong?
I need to do something about this
But I’m too scared to get it wrong
What I have tried has already failed
And I have no courage or energy left
Can I find something more
Or do I just need to accept what is?
Is it ok to be just surviving?